We can tolerate a girl who says “ip” instead of “if”; “fepol” instead of “people”. “Red” is easy to pronounce but should no be confused with “rid”. Fuchsia pink is difficult to spell.
“English is my favorite subject sir but it’s difficult”, says a 13-year old girl in an English remediation class. Another one added: “Mga brayt man mi sir pero ma-wrong ispeling man gyod”
Even English textbooks used by some schoolchildren are not free of grammatical flaws. In composition classes, you’ll read many disastrous essays. I remember how a student of Expository Writing course who almost give up because of “poor English”. She majored English. A year ago, I heard that she passed the LET. I am confident her self tag “poor English” has improved a lot.
I was surprised when I read about the “disastrous answer” of Bb. Pilipinas candidate No. 15, Janina San Miguel. Least expected, she was crowned as Bb. Pilipinas-World.
Lorenzo Niñal transcribed her answer in his blog post, My pami-ley. This is how she (Janina) said everything:
Tan: The question is what role did your family play for you as candidate to Binibining Pilipinas?
Janina: Well, my family’s role for me es so important, becos… der was dow, dir, dey was da one… whoo’s…very… haha… oh, I’m so sorry. Um, my pami-ley, my fami-ley… oh my God. I’m… OK, I’m so sorry. I, I told you dat I’m so honfident. Eto, ahmm wait: Ahahahaha. Um, sorry guys becos des was really my perst pageant ever! Because I’m only seventeen years old. And, ahaha-hee. I, I did not ikspek dat I came from… I came from one of da taff ten. Hmm… So… but I said, dot… my family es da most important persons in my life. Thank you.
jg: what keeps you busy there?
julie ann: I’ok where you now can I have no appointment, u?
julie ann: I’m here to to take the chance with my friends can I?
jg: What do you mean?
julie ann: I’m saw my friends can I friends to where you now? r u take the launch
julie ann: are u a foreigner? or else in the phils.
jg: i’m not..
julie ann: y you can’t take the launch me also you your webcam?
julie ann: oi we have not reply now can I know you?
jg: im sorry, im working on something here
julie ann: ok I will understand can I know ur work?
jg: im a [… my work..]
julie ann: because I’m a student where? I hope you are my inspirations? he he he ……
jg: what do you mean?
julie ann: He he he joke only friend
julie ann: ok I’m fine.
julie ann: ok where you now in the UN?
jg: what does UN mean?
julie ann: united nations wher you now?
jg: i dont understand…
julie ann: you don’t understand un oh my god
Many have read “He is the cow”, an essay written by a Bihari (India) in a civil service examination.
The cow is a successful animal. Also he is 4 footed, and because he is female, he give milks, [but will do so when he is got child.] He is same like-God, sacred to Hindus and useful to man.
But he has got four legs together. Two are forward and two are afterwards. His whole body can be utilised for use. More so the milk. Milk comes from 4 taps attached to his basement. (Horses don’t have any such attachment.)
The candidate passed the examination. Finish reading this essay and forget “your English”.
Blog I author (Bisaya): Ambot Lang!